August 24 ~ The brain drain is mainly insane

Ok, so I've been a stay-at-home-Mom for the past 12 years.

I can multi-task the best of you under the table.

But I didn't realize that the "non-mommy" parts of my brain were shriveling into hard rocks of dried matter due to lack of use.

Holy Crap. No wonder they tell older people to do crossword puzzles. The brain IS a muscle that needs exercise!

So, I may have mentioned here before that I got myself a little part-time job. It's supposed to be 5 hours per week....but for the first few months it will be more. Partly due to the tasks that need my attention and partly due to my learning curve.

I decided to take a class in San Francisco to learn the computer program that I'm trying to use.
I took BART into the City, which was a big deal for me, as I'd never taken it alone before. I'm waiting on the platform for my train having anxiety attacks over the bombings in the London subway. We live in a very diverse community: all ages, races, sexes (yes, I meant to say that), religions. That is why I LOVE living here and bringing our kids up here. Yet, I found myself secretly doing "racial profiling" as I waited for my train. "Do you think he has a bomb attached to his body?" I asked myself at least once. Isn't that terrible? I bitch-slapped myself internally as soon as I realized I was doing it.....but still! (shudder) I can't even believe I'm admitting to it here.

So, after recovering from the bitch-slap, I opened a piece of newspaper and strolled onto the train as if I do this everyday. I faked being a commuter. (proud smug look)

When I got off the train and rode the escalator up to the street all I could see was bright morning blue sky (no fog, can you believe it?) and the stark white tops of skyscrapers. It was GORGEOUS! I suddenly morphed into a Sex And The City character.....or maybe That Girl. (Except I didn't have a cute little hat to throw...dammit.)

I had to stand on the street for a few minutes to get my bearings, so I just breathed it all in. (I was in jeans and tennis shoes...but I faked sexy spikey, strappy, shoes and hottie clothes in my mind.) After figuring out where I was, I began walking to my class. I passed a Starbucks and fancy deli's and elegant little shops, museums, and realized I could go into any of them. This might not seem like a big deal to you, but I'm out of practice being by myself. Being alone in the grocery store is just NOT the same thing!

At my class, they served hot coffee, had clean bathrooms, icey water. Damn, it was heaven! :) lol
The volume of information I learned was overwhelming. My shriveled-like-jerky-brain was absorbing information as fast as possible, but it couldn't keep up with the flow. By the end of the day, my brain was dripping like an over-watered houseplant.

The instructor asked if I had any questions, and I asked for a moment of silence so that my brain could catch up.

Hey, I get funny when nervous.